This week, I’m writing to you from a place of vulnerability and a moment of peace. Recently, I’ve been navigating a challenging journey with chronic pain – a part of my story I’m only now beginning to fully acknowledge and own.
Amidst this struggle, I found myself in a Restorative Yoga class after too long away from the formal practice. Honestly, and simply put, I spent the first half of the year pushing. In June my body began screaming at me. Naturally, I dove into my own healing work, and discovered layers of unprocessed anxiety and stress, nervous system dysregulation, and stored trauma my body had been signaling for some time (plus aging), all of which I was overriding in the name of “success.” As I heal, I’m grateful for my body helping me to re-route, re-define, and be placed back on a path of surrender, balance, and trust as I re-center myself in self-care, healing, and new boundaries of all kinds.
In class, as I settled into the stillness, removed from the over-stimulation of daily life, I experienced a simple but powerful shift. This moment of intentional rest, of honoring myself, brought a wave of peace and integration I knew I’d been missing, but was denying myself of.
I was touched by the teacher’s words of Metta, or loving-kindness meditation. Metta is a practice of extending goodwill, kindness, and compassion towards ourselves and others. It has many layers, from self-compassion to universal love.
In the spirit of self-care I invite you to let these words of Metta wash over you:
May you be well,
May you know peace,
May you be safe from harm,
May you know deep joy,
May you be free from suffering,
May you accept yourself completely as you are,
May you know love,
May you be at ease through the ebb and flow,
May you take care of yourself wisely and joyfully,
May you be rooted in trust,
May you have grace for yourself and others,
May you be present,
May you be kind to yourself,
May you know your worth,
May you live with wonder in this life just as it is,
May you embody your truth without fear,
May you be free.
Research done by the Psychophysiologic Disorders Association has found that much of chronic pain/illness is connected to our emotional experiences. Our bodies, and our pain, are constantly nudging us toward parts of self calling for our attention, and care.
I was in a functional freeze and fight response. Not only was I not listening to my body’s whispers, but I reacted to my symptoms with fear, panic, and frustration which only spurred a fear-pain response cycle. With compassion for my initial reaction, it’s been key for me to start relating to pain with acceptance, and taking action in alignment with my body’s needs.
Let this be a reminder of the power of self-kindness and surrender. This doesn’t mean giving up or not putting in work, but rather it’s about the energy with which we are approaching ourselves and the actions we take.
Are your habits and ways of being, being kind to you? Are they honoring you?
Until next Thursday, may you find moments of peace in stillness. And if you’d curious about meditation to support your healing, learn about my course Everyday Mindfulness for Stress & Anxiety.
Warmly,
Elana
